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The Red Book of Westmarch (Archives)

• Humor, Web Links

  What if ‘The Hobbit’ was a Nigerian 419 scam?

  09.25.09 | Kunochan | Permalink | Speak, friend and comment!

  In view of this, I received your contact through a friend and counselor, an ingenious wizard, who noted you as a Burglar who wants a good job, plenty of Excitement and reasonable Reward. And I and my twelve companions have agreed to give you 10% of the total gold and jewels that the dragon Smaug now rests upon if you can join us on our long journey. When you have agreed please tell us the place where you dwell and send one hundred pence so that we might travel to you.

• Humor, News

  Lady Galadriel Wounded in Theater Mishap

  09.02.09 | Kunochan | Permalink | Speak, friend and comment!

  Galadriel Alatáriel, The Lady of the Galadhrim, suffered a head wound yesterday evening when she was struck by a prop during a theatrical performance in Caras Galadhon.

• Features, Humor

  If LOTR Had Been Written By a Game Developer

  08.11.09 | Kunochan | Permalink | 3 Comments

  “Frodo!” Gandalf cried, as the old man rose up suddenly proud and strong like an elf king of old. “The armies of Mordor stand at the gates of Minas Tirith! Rohan has fallen, and Erebor is is besieged! The hour is late, and the Ring must be destr—is that really a Silmaril?”

• Web Links

  Sauron’s Blog #49: Melkor 1, Noldor 0

  08.11.09 | Kunochan | Permalink | Speak, friend and comment!

  First off, we finally — finally — launched a finished, fully-functioning Flying Fire-Breathing Monster version 1.0. On the official paperwork these things are called Úruloki; I wanted to call them the Great Worms, although they don’t look very much like worms. But when the first one attacked the Elves, they all ran away yelling “dragon! Dragon!” Which I think means “I’m crapping my pants in fear!” in elfy-talk.

• Humor

  Humor: Party Balance In The Hobbit

  06.09.09 | Kunochan | Permalink | Speak, friend and comment!

  If you’re (a) a Tolkien fan and (b) and role-playing game player, then you will also find this amusing.

• Features

  Tolkien’s characters — how would they vote?

  11.03.08 | Kunochan | Permalink | Speak, friend and comment!

  As for whom Gandalf would advise you to vote, he would be torn between McCain’s strong military stance against Mordor, and Obama’s pledge to reverse the worst excesses of Denethor’s disastrous reign. Chances are he’d back Ron Paul, as Gandalf would be quite keen to see a hobbit in the White House.

• Web Links

  More fun from the Kunochan archives

  10.03.08 | Kunochan | Permalink | Speak, friend and comment!

  I have a couple of old LOTR-related stories on my other blog.
  LOTRO Announces One Million Open Beta Accounts: A Play In One Act By Kunochan
  “Lord of the Rings Online” — Kuno’s First Impressions

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Aiya! Periannath.com is a weblog for the genuine Tolkien aficionado. There are no 13-year-old Orlando Bloom fans here. Get news and features about the writings, the legendarium, the languages, collectibles and games, and yes, the movies.

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